Kids are so smart. In this case, smarter than most adults. Well, at least this 2-year old is smarter than the ones who think extending Bush's tax cuts are a good idea. And, in all seriousness, who can't get behind unicorns for all?
Showing posts with label Bush was the worst President in history. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Bush was the worst President in history. Show all posts
Wednesday, November 10, 2010
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
George W. Bush . . . Motivator?
Well, it sounded strange to me too. President George W. Bush a motivational speaker? Really?
For the life of me, I wasn't sure what he might motivate other than my desire to hear hours of nothing but finger nails scratching chalkboards, but I might have been wrong. I'm open to that possibility.
It seems that about 11,000 people paid $4.50 each in advance or $225 at the door (yes, that's right, if you waited and made a spur of the moment decision to attend Get Motivated yesterday in Ft. Worth, you paid 50 times the cost of the ticket for your laziness) to be motivated by our former Commander-in-Chief.
And he did not let them down. Oh no. He spent 28 minutes sharing incredibly inspirational anecdotes including the memorable one about picking up dog crap and how his life had changed. Seriously. The thing is that I wonder if it occurs to him that many people in this country feel like he left a big pile of dog crap on all of us when he finally left after a very long 8 years.
I have to be honest here, there are two things I can't stop thinking:
Two things are certain: President Bush was successful in motivating millions of people to flee the GOP and millions of people to vote for Obama. Thank you, President Bush!
Because I don't want you to feel left out of all the motivation, here's a 2 minute clip of President Bush yesterday motivating the masses.
Oh, this just got better! Jon Stewart gave his priceless take on the whole George Bush as Motivator-in-Chief thing! God, I love Jon Stewart so much!
For the life of me, I wasn't sure what he might motivate other than my desire to hear hours of nothing but finger nails scratching chalkboards, but I might have been wrong. I'm open to that possibility.
It seems that about 11,000 people paid $4.50 each in advance or $225 at the door (yes, that's right, if you waited and made a spur of the moment decision to attend Get Motivated yesterday in Ft. Worth, you paid 50 times the cost of the ticket for your laziness) to be motivated by our former Commander-in-Chief.
And he did not let them down. Oh no. He spent 28 minutes sharing incredibly inspirational anecdotes including the memorable one about picking up dog crap and how his life had changed. Seriously. The thing is that I wonder if it occurs to him that many people in this country feel like he left a big pile of dog crap on all of us when he finally left after a very long 8 years.
I have to be honest here, there are two things I can't stop thinking:
- President Bush was speaking in his own backyard in the State of Texas - where he grew up, served as governor, ran for President, vacationed every weekend while President, and now lives - and they couldn't pull in more than $4.50 per person for this event? I would have thought he'd be able to at least bring in $5 per person.
- If I had been in that audience and spent my hard earned $4.50 to hear President Bush speak and had to endure 28 minutes of dog poop stories, I would have demanded my money back.
Two things are certain: President Bush was successful in motivating millions of people to flee the GOP and millions of people to vote for Obama. Thank you, President Bush!
Because I don't want you to feel left out of all the motivation, here's a 2 minute clip of President Bush yesterday motivating the masses.
Oh, this just got better! Jon Stewart gave his priceless take on the whole George Bush as Motivator-in-Chief thing! God, I love Jon Stewart so much!
| The Daily Show With Jon Stewart | Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c | |||
| George W. Bush Hits the Lectures Circuit | ||||
| ||||
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
Let's Get Motivated!
I'm going to be attending a motivational seminar on October 26th and it's sure to be the best day of my life. Well, okay, it's sure to be a day of my life.
No, I'm not going to see Tony Robbins or even that chick who wrote The Secret.
I'm going to see the 43rd President of the United States George W. Bush!
That's right. President Bush has hit the motivational speaking circuit. There's no word on exactly what he'll be speaking on, but I'm guessing it's not "How to Win Friends and Influence People" and he's probably not handing out financial advice given how he took that surplus President Clinton gift-wrapped and handed him on a silver platter and turned it into a ginormous deficit. But maybe he'll teach us all how to claim "Mission Accomplished" before actually achieving anything.
What do you think this kind of motivational training is worth? $500? $1000 maybe? Well, you're in luck! It's just $4.95 per person, but if we get a group together, we can all attend for the low low price of just $19 for the entire group!
Wait! There's more!
Check out who's on the line-up with President Bush: General Colin Powell (Legendary Solider-Statesman), Terry Bradshaw (Legendary NFL Hall of Fame Quarterback), Zig Ziglar (America's #1 Motivator), Dr. Robert Schuller (America's Best Inspirational Speaker), Tamera Lowe (Top Sales Expert and Author of Get Motivated!), Rick Belluzzo (President of Microsoft), and Rudy Guiliani (America's Mayor).
That's a pretty heavy-duty line-up that I'm fairly certain is worth $4.95, even if President Bush weren't going to be there. Luckily, he will be there though. So we'll DEFINITELY get our money's worth!
Hurry! Today is the 21st. We've got to make our plans quickly.
Saturday, May 9, 2009
The Official George W. Bush Librarium
Have you heard how former President George W. Bush has raised $100 million for his library since leaving office just over 100 days ago? It's true. I'm sure you're wondering why all this money is needed.
Luckily for you, Little Merry Sunshine has amazing connections (you're surprised I have connections in the GOP, aren't you?) and I have gotten my hands on the architectural drawings for the future Presidential Library for our 43rd President. Because I'm so generous, I'm going to share them with you. Unfortunately, they wouldn't let me put the pictures on LMS, so you'll have to click here to see them.
Trust me, this is a library truly fitting of our 43rd President.
You're welcome.
Luckily for you, Little Merry Sunshine has amazing connections (you're surprised I have connections in the GOP, aren't you?) and I have gotten my hands on the architectural drawings for the future Presidential Library for our 43rd President. Because I'm so generous, I'm going to share them with you. Unfortunately, they wouldn't let me put the pictures on LMS, so you'll have to click here to see them.
Trust me, this is a library truly fitting of our 43rd President.
You're welcome.
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
Toddler Says Good-Bye To George
I thought I was done. Really, I did. But this is just too good to pass up. I laughed so hard I almost wet myself.
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
It's A New Day!
Today is a significant day.
First, it's the 3 week anniversary of the end of our long national nightmare known as the Bush Administration. That's right. As of today, President Barack Obama has been the Commander in Chief for 21 days. In that time, he's done some amazing things for women. First, he repealed the Global Gag Rule which prevented nongovernmental organizations around the world that accepted aid from the US from discussing birth control options with women. Second, the first bill he signed into law was the Lily Ledbetter Fair Pay Act. Seriously. "That one" has done more for women in the last 21 days than our former Idiot in Chief did in 8 years. On behalf of women all over the world, thank you Mr. President. Of course, I'd be happier if the women's health provisions hadn't been stripped from the Stimulus Package, but I'm going to focus on what's good right this minute.
Second, today is also the 2 year anniversary of the date on which President Barack Obama announced his campaign for President of the United States. I remember watching his speech on CNN (CNN and CSPAN are my porn, in case you didn't know) and crying. Yes, I do a lot of crying where Barack Obama is concerned. I already knew what many folks were just beginning to learn: Barack Obama is the real deal.
In case you've forgotten, here's the speech that launched it all on the steps of the Illinois State Capitol in Springfield.
Watch President Obama sign the Ledbetter Act:
First, it's the 3 week anniversary of the end of our long national nightmare known as the Bush Administration. That's right. As of today, President Barack Obama has been the Commander in Chief for 21 days. In that time, he's done some amazing things for women. First, he repealed the Global Gag Rule which prevented nongovernmental organizations around the world that accepted aid from the US from discussing birth control options with women. Second, the first bill he signed into law was the Lily Ledbetter Fair Pay Act. Seriously. "That one" has done more for women in the last 21 days than our former Idiot in Chief did in 8 years. On behalf of women all over the world, thank you Mr. President. Of course, I'd be happier if the women's health provisions hadn't been stripped from the Stimulus Package, but I'm going to focus on what's good right this minute.
Second, today is also the 2 year anniversary of the date on which President Barack Obama announced his campaign for President of the United States. I remember watching his speech on CNN (CNN and CSPAN are my porn, in case you didn't know) and crying. Yes, I do a lot of crying where Barack Obama is concerned. I already knew what many folks were just beginning to learn: Barack Obama is the real deal.
In case you've forgotten, here's the speech that launched it all on the steps of the Illinois State Capitol in Springfield.
Watch President Obama sign the Ledbetter Act:
Monday, February 9, 2009
I Thank W Because . . . ???
Have you seen the website I Thank W?
The gist of it is that evidently there are folks who think W was a good president and are grateful for the 8 years he stole from us. When they visit the site, they are encouraged to complete the sentence "I thank W because . . . "
So you don't have to burn your retinas by visiting the site, here are some actual testimonials. I swear these are real. I couldn't put these words together to save my life.
A (formerly good) friend of mine inadvertently alerted me to it this afternoon and I'm certain I will never be the same. In fact, I can feel the brain matter inside my head has diminished after reading just a couple of posts over there. I should have simply stuck forks in my eyes. It would have been more pleasurable than reading that drivel.
The gist of it is that evidently there are folks who think W was a good president and are grateful for the 8 years he stole from us. When they visit the site, they are encouraged to complete the sentence "I thank W because . . . "
So you don't have to burn your retinas by visiting the site, here are some actual testimonials. I swear these are real. I couldn't put these words together to save my life.
Mark in Bronxville says "I thank W because he steered us through the dangerous world following the events of September 11, 2001. He kept his promise of keeping us safe. He was a good man who restored respect to the Oval Office. His heart reached across the world and sought to bring freedom to all. He was the real deal. A good man. He was not guided by being the most popular person, but instead was guided by doing what he felt was really right. Thank you President Bush for 8 years of solid leadership."The best part? All of these "testimonials" will be collected in a book and presented to Chimpy on January 20, 2010! Yes, really.
Diedre Himel of Kingwood, TX writes "I thank W because . . . Bush is a great moral leader, a true father of our country in the same honored tradition as our great forefathers, George Washington, Thomas Jefferson, and Abraham Lincoln."Beckye Estill of Cedar Park hails "I thank W because... he stood firmly against terrorists and worked to keep America safe. We have had no attacks on American soil since 9-11 due to his vigilance. He has stood firmly in protecting life from conception to natural death. He has stood firmly for faith and freedom. His strong moral stance has helped hold the tide of moral degeneration in our nation. He has stood firmly for marriage between one man and one woman. His work to provide help for those with AIDS will go down as one of the major achievements of his administration. He and Laura have been great examples for our nation, and I'm grateful God placed him in the position of leadership on our behalf. God bless you and your family. I look forward to seeing the good plans God has in store for you in the future."
A (formerly good) friend of mine inadvertently alerted me to it this afternoon and I'm certain I will never be the same. In fact, I can feel the brain matter inside my head has diminished after reading just a couple of posts over there. I should have simply stuck forks in my eyes. It would have been more pleasurable than reading that drivel.
Friday, January 30, 2009
Government Bailout Solution - Damn I'm Brilliant
My cell phone notified me this morning through Fox News (seriously, I throw up a little everytime I remember that my phone gets streaming news only from FauxNews) that Exxon Mobil reported record profits for 2008. $45.2 BILLION.
We all know where this came from: $4.50 per gallon gas.
$4.50 was the necessary price, my ass. If it $4.50 per gallon was required because the cost of oil demanded it, then Exxon Mobil shouldn't be showing $45.2 BILLION in profits.
Meanwhile, back at the ranch, the Big 3 Automakers are struggling to make it from day to day. And the Federal Government helped them out to the tune of $14 BILLION in a bridge loan last month.
It seems to me that the Exxon Mobil can thank automakers for these windfall profits. I mean, without cars, who would Exxon Mobil sell the majority of its gas to? And if the Big 3 fail, I don't really see Exxon Mobil having another banner year.
What if, instead of the Federal Government handing the Big 3 $14 Billion with all kinds of strings attached, the Feds turned to Exxon and said, "You've got the biggest stake in a healthy auto industry of anyone in the country. In 2008, you screwed all Americans with your price gouging and as your punishment, we're going to require you to turn over your entire $45.2 BILLION to the Big 3 in order to help them get back on their feet."
That's a win-win. Good jobs would stay in America. The Big 3 would have plenty of money to bring new, more fuel efficient cars onto the market. Taxpayers wouldn't be shelling out additional money to help Detroit. And Exxon Mobil would learn that there's a new sheriff in town and grown-ups are now in charge. There's no more free rides like under W.
This idea is free, Mr. President. Consider it an inauguration gift.
We all know where this came from: $4.50 per gallon gas.
$4.50 was the necessary price, my ass. If it $4.50 per gallon was required because the cost of oil demanded it, then Exxon Mobil shouldn't be showing $45.2 BILLION in profits.
Meanwhile, back at the ranch, the Big 3 Automakers are struggling to make it from day to day. And the Federal Government helped them out to the tune of $14 BILLION in a bridge loan last month.
It seems to me that the Exxon Mobil can thank automakers for these windfall profits. I mean, without cars, who would Exxon Mobil sell the majority of its gas to? And if the Big 3 fail, I don't really see Exxon Mobil having another banner year.
What if, instead of the Federal Government handing the Big 3 $14 Billion with all kinds of strings attached, the Feds turned to Exxon and said, "You've got the biggest stake in a healthy auto industry of anyone in the country. In 2008, you screwed all Americans with your price gouging and as your punishment, we're going to require you to turn over your entire $45.2 BILLION to the Big 3 in order to help them get back on their feet."
That's a win-win. Good jobs would stay in America. The Big 3 would have plenty of money to bring new, more fuel efficient cars onto the market. Taxpayers wouldn't be shelling out additional money to help Detroit. And Exxon Mobil would learn that there's a new sheriff in town and grown-ups are now in charge. There's no more free rides like under W.
This idea is free, Mr. President. Consider it an inauguration gift.
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