Wednesday, October 15, 2008

FREE Cell Phone Towers for Everyone!

Dear Sprint,

It has come to my attention that your competitors - AT&T & Verizon - have doled out possibly illegal campaign contributions to John "I'm a Maverick" & Cindy McCain in the form of FREE cell phone towers at their ranch somewhere in BFE California because they had a difficult time getting quality reception on their property.

I have the same problem at my house in Suburban Chicago. I would contact Verizon or AT&T about this, but they're not my cell phone provider. You are and I'm sure you don't want to be outdone by them. So I'm coming to you first. Of course, should I fail to achieve satisfaction with you, I'll happily change my service.

You may not be aware of this, but I have been your customer for 10 years and I was involved in student government in college. Now, while I'm not running for President of the USA, I'm not a beer heiress, and I was never a POW, I am currently the president of my own company, I drink beer, AND I write a blog that has upwards of 8 readers per day. Sure, I've never shot a moose or won runner-up in a beauty pagaent, but I do own a tiara (2 in fact), was a high school cheerleader, and killed a mouse once.

I think it's exciting that the cell phone industry is giving away FREE cell phone towers to customers to ease their reception challenges. For all the times I've sat on hold with your customer service department, this is truly a David-Golliath type victory.

Scheduling a time for installation of my new FREE cell phone tower will not be a problem. I'm available Monday between 10am and 12noon. I'll keep an eye out for you.

Thanks so much!

Little Merry Sunshine


  1. LMAO!

    Oh, Ms. Sunshine, I could fall in love with you. You don't happen to look exactly like Ewan Macgregor, do you?

  2. Thanks so much American Girl!

    Um, no. I don't look like Ewan Macgregor. He's got much better hair than I do and I'm a girl.

    I'm so glad you like my blog and will keep coming back even though I don't look like Ewan Macgregor.

  3. That's actually a relief (for so many reasons).

  4. Dear Sprint,

    As a duly invested fundraiser for a specific college on the North Shore, I would also like to suggest that you install a free cell tower on our college campus, aka Sucking Vortex of Cell Phone Suckitude. While I am not the president of my own company nor do I drink beer, I have killed and butchered several moose-like ungulents. Moreover, I can give you easy access to over 1400 individuals who spend a majority of class time complaining that they can't get any signal, thereby impeding their rights to IM and/or text each other at any given moment, including pop quizes.



Thank you for leaving a comment on Little Merry Sunshine. Due to the volume of spam comments, all comments must be approved to ensure they are not spam or spambots. Thank you for understanding.