Life is Like a Cup of Coffee

For all of my coffee loving friends (and everyone else too) . . .



P.S. I know I've been completely absent from LMS and I have appreciated the kind notes from my loyal readers concerned about the absence, but I promise LMS really coming back in the next couple of weeks. I haven't had a home computer or internet for two months, but as of next weekend, I will and then I'll start blogging again regularly. Trust me, I've missed Little Merry Sunshine and you!

Have a fun and safe Halloween!

Where's Little Merry Sunshine These Days?

Dear Readers,

I feel I've let you down of late.

You've been quite faithful to me and visited Little Merry Sunshine on a daily basis, but since January, I've only written 74 (now 75) posts for you. When you consider that in 2010, I gave you 210 posts, I'm really slipping. One might think that I don't love you anymore or that I don't enjoy writing Little Merry Sunshine as much as I did in 2008 when I wrote 412 posts. One would be wrong.

I do love you. And I do love writing Little Merry Sunshine.

In fact, that's exactly where my dilemma lies. I love you and love writing Little Merry Sunshine so much that I would rather give you fewer high quality posts than give you daily posts that suck.

So why aren't I writing as much anymore? I'm so glad you asked.

You'll recall that in February I started a new job as the Alumni Relations & Events Manager at Lake Forest Graduate School of Management. Simply getting acclimated to that has taken some time. I've now been at my awesome job 5 1/2 months and I think I'm finally feeling like I know where we keep the good office supplies. I jest. What I'm really finally feeling is that I own my job. That I know what I'm doing and I feel confident in it. But getting to that point has taken a lot of hard work. More nights than I care to admit, I've crawled into bed at 8pm.

Additionally, I've been working out. You may have heard a rumor that I've dropped 40 pounds. That rumor is true thanks to exercise and eating better. It turns out that working out takes time and is sort of tiring. If only I could write while I swim, you'd have more to read.

Then we get to health issues. Thankfully, not mine. My mom and both cats, Betsey and Ross, have had major health issues since April, which have all consumed a great deal of my energy. For the record, I never thought I'd be a pet owner who scheduled her life around insulin shots for her cat. But I am now.

And finally, I'm in the process of buying my very first home (item #67 on my Bucket List). Frankly, this is my friend Derek's fault. And by fault, I mean that he put this idea into my brain last month when I mentioned that I was looking to rent an apartment. I've found a place I love and we're in the final stages of negotiations. I can't guess how this is going to end, but given that it's coinciding with the debt ceiling debate, I'm a little sick to my stomach until it's all signed, sealed and delivered. Once it's all over, I'll share the fun stories about my adventures in home buying.

All of this is happening, as I also try to have something that resembles a social life.

I promise to get back to LMS soon. I really do miss you all. Plus, as you can imagine, I've had a whole lot to say about Sarah Palin, Michele Bachman, the debt ceiling crisis, and now Congressman Joe Walsh that I've been itching to write about.

Will & Kate Wanna Live Like Me!

So I hear that Prince William and his fiance Kate Middleton want to live like "normal" people and have decided to forgo the traditional royal staff. For comparisons sake, Prince Charles has a staff of 150 personal servants. Honestly, how does he manage with such a small staff? Oh, sorry, I digress.

I think it's terrific that Will and Kate want to be like me. How about we trade places? They can live like me and I'll try to live the life they lead.

Certainly, life can't get much more normal than mine...

• I make my own bed.
• I do my own laundry.
• I scrub toilets, scoop cat litter, wash windows, vacuum, dust, mop the floor, and do dishes.
• I run a successful business.
• I sit on two boards and spend a good amount of time volunteering.
• I clip coupons, do my own grocery shopping, and my own cooking.
• I live on a (tight) budget and space out bills during the month so I always have plenty of money.
• I use Freecycle where one person's trash really is another's treasure.
• I take care of my mom and used to help take care of Nana.
• I shop the clearance rack and almost never wear designer or pay full price for clothes (or much else).
• I drive an 11 year old car (well, okay, it's practically new, but still) and before that, I drove a 15 year old car.
• I shovel my own snow, mow my own lawn, and plant my vegetable garden to live healthier and keep my grocery bills down. I also personally weed said garden.
• When I go to a concert or sporting event, I rarely have "great" seats and certainly never a reserved box just for me (although, I'm open to it).
• Paparazzi never follow me around and I don't have a stylist to make sure I am never a fashion "don't" (and if you could have seen me the last 2 weeks, trust me you'd say I needed a stylist).
• I fly like cattle on mass market airlines, always in the economy class and I take public transportation.
• If I ever get married, I will have a very simple ceremony and honeymoon. Me, my fiance, and a minister or justice of the peace on a beach is my style.
• I even write my own blog, write my own Tweets, and communicate personally with my friends on Facebook.

The only thing I have staff for (and it's not even regular staff) is to wake me up in the morning when I've had an especially long night or cannot miss something super early in the morning. But most days, I have to set my own alarm clock.

Will & Kate just let me know when you'd like to change lives. I'm happy to loan out mine for awhile. Otherwise, please stop pretending that you live like normal people.

I'm not complaining. I love my life. Most days. Just like most people, I think. I just think it's funny that two people who obviously know nothing about how most of the world lives (and I realize that I live far better than most of the world) think they are "normal" by forgoing an army of personal servants to do everything from change the roll of toilet paper to fly their personal plane.

All of this said, I'd venture to guess that when Will and Kate takeover my life, they'll be pleased with the assortment of china and silver I have. I seem to inherited an unreal amount of china sets and silver services. Where they all came from, I have no idea. But they'd only have to eat on the same dishes and use the same flatware once every couple of weeks.

A Lifetime of Dreams

As I go through the process of cleaning out Nana's house, I look around at all the stuff that's accumulated during her almost 93 years and I think about the meaning of it all. On one level, it's all stuff. Some of it has some financial worth, but most of it can only be valued in sentiment. But on another level, all the stuff she's collected represents her lifetime of dreams. Dreams not only for herself, but also for her children and grandchildren.

I've looked through old photo albums and scrapbooks and seen her pride in my mom's and uncle's accomplishments. I've read through the letters she sent to Presidents Kennedy and Johnson after my grandfather died in 1961 attempting to get a mistake about my grandfather's VA benefits (and subsequent benefits for Nana) corrected. I've read letters she wrote to my mom and uncle later in life telling them of her unconditional love and letters she wrote to Dave and me telling us how proud she was of our accomplishments and her hopes for us. I've flipped through the well-worn pages of her Bible knowing that she turned to it nightly for comfort, inspiration, and life's answers. I've found boxes of my baby clothes (many of which she made)she carefully preserved in hopes my daughter would wear them someday. I found the blanket that kept me warm in my crib when I first came home from the hospital (and initially tossed it in the charity box, but then got sentimental and saved it). I've walked through her childhood in Mississippi with her sisters through pictures and diaries. The house itself is the culmination of a lifelong dream. She built it in 1969 from her life savings. The stories I've heard say she would come over after work once the frame was built and hang sheets where she wanted the internal walls to be located. There probably weren't too many other women who were designing and building their own homes. I've held the dress she wore to my parents' wedding in 1970 in awe of just how exquisite it was. She was so proud to walk her daughter down the aisle. I found a silk sari a friend had custom made for Nana in Fiji. Mom didn't even know of its existence. I also found half a dozen quilts Nana hand sewed and felt the care, hope and love she sewed into each stitch.

Sure, it's just stuff, but it all represents a life well lived. She may not have been rich in a financial sense, but she lived life on her terms with love and a never-ending faith in everyone and achieved most, if not all, of her dreams. That makes her wealthy in my book. I hope that when I pass away, whomever is charged with dividing up my personal belongings can say that about me.

Things I Wish I'd Said

Something happened a few days ago and I didn't quite handle it the way I wish I would have. It wasn't a big deal, but later, there were a few things I wish I'd said. Frankly, I don't have regrets in life, for the most part, but there are times I wish I'd really said what I was feeling rather than biting my tongue because I was afraid to speak my mind and heart.

In no particular order, the list below represents most of what I wish I'd said at various points in my life, but now it's too late. The moment has passed or it no longer matters or I'm still not brave enough to say them to the people I should have said them to. If you think one or more of these are things I started to say to you at some point, you may be right, but you may also be wrong. If you ask me directly, I'll tell you . . . probably.

• Yes.
• No.
• I'm sorry.
• I'm proud of you.
• I need a break.
  
• I miss you.
• I forgive you.
• You broke my heart.
• I wish you hadn't lied to me.
• Stop.
• We can work it out.
• Let's fix this.
• I'll figure it out.
• Please help me.
• I'm going to stay in DC.
• I have to take care of me.
  
• I think you made the wrong decision.
• I made a mistake.
• Don't go.
• It really will be okay.
• No, it's not okay.
• I'm leaving.
• Thank you.
• I'm scared.
  
• You can't talk to me that way.
• Please leave.
• I'm not strong enough to do this alone.
  
• Stay.
• Pick me.
• What can I do?
• How can I fix this?
• Actually, it was you. Not me.
• Sorry, I'm out of your league.
• Our friendship is worth more to me than a guy.
• I can't even remember why we fought.
• You were right and I was wrong.
• You are a Mean Girl.
• I deserve better.
• No, you don't speak for me.
• I shouldn't have walked away.
• No, I'm not sorry.
• That's offensive.

And finally, the last thing I should have said, but didn't . . . . I love you.