"We Can Be Better" - President Obama

Did you see President Obama's speech tonight at the memorial service in Tucson? I saw most of it and can honestly say that I was moved to tears at moments. (Surprise, I know.) It is my believe that this speech will go down as one of his absolute best. It's also my hope and prayer tonight that the President's words will help calm the vitriol.

I think that would be the best way to honor all of the victims of the horrific tragedy this past weekend. We all need to remember that words matter and have consequences. Maybe some of the recent rhetoric played a role in the shooting and maybe it didn't. I actually don't think it matters. We need to listen to each other and differing points of view. We need to remember that we can disagree without being disagreeable. We need to make sure that those on the fringes don't fall through the cracks. And we need to make sure that mental health care is fully funded.

In case you missed it, spend 30 minutes to watch the video below. It will change you or at least touch your heart and remind you of what is good. Tonight, our Commander in Chief was our Healer in Chief.

Visit msnbc.com for breaking news, world news, and news about the economy

You can also read a full transcript of the President's remarks here. Of course, those are the prepared remarks. You won't get his off-the-script comments about Congresswoman Giffords and his other unscripted remarks.

Do You Remember Your "First Time Around"?

Do you remember your first crush or first love? If you're like most of us, it took place sometime during junior high or high school.

Maybe it was the boy who walked you home throughout junior high and carried your books... Maybe it was the Greek God who turned your world upside down because he was just always there... Maybe it was tennis player who wrote with the red pencil in summer school, making it difficult to read his name on his paper, but ultimately had you with that first kiss... Maybe it was the Band Geek who drove you home everyday... Maybe it was someone else.

Whomever it was, I'm sure you fell hard. And if you stop to think about it now, you can probably instantly go right back to that moment and how you felt. If you're like most of us, it didn't last. Only very few of us actually get it right the first time around.

In his second novel book, First Time Around, Michael Bellito takes us back to that time. That time of innocence, when the world was easy, yet our love seemed all-consuming and the heartbreak heart breaking.

For John Hersey High School alums, Mr. Bellito was one of our favorite English teachers and/or speech coaches. More than anything, he introduced me to my lifelong love: the love of words and how to weave them together to tell a story.

Mr. Bellito will launch First Time Around at the Arlington Heights Memorial Library on Wednesday, January 12th at 7pm. He'll do a reading and sign copies. Of course, books will be for sale. Go and say hello. Trust me, he loves nothing more than reconnecting with former students.

Can't make it on the 12th? Don't worry, he'll also be at the Prospect Heights Library on Thursday, February 3rd at 7pm. I'll be there.

Are YOU Part of The Inner Circle?

I, of course, am referring to The Inner Circle by Brad Meltzer. It arrives in bookstores everywhere NOW.

This book is going to be huge. How do I know? Because I do. That's how. Now go out and buy it because I said so. If you hit Barnes & Noble in Arlington Heights early enough, you'll run into me. Say hello.

Do you need more persuasion? Click here to read the first chapter. Now go buy the book.

Still not convinced? Watch the commercial below.


NOW go buy the book.

And if you don't have anything to do next Friday, January 21st, come to the city with my mom and me to meet Brad (well, I already know him, but you know what I mean). He'll sign your book and tell you all kinds of cool stuff. Really. The book signing starts at 12noon at the Border's on State Street. Then mom and I are off to lunch at The Walnut Room, as the finale of her belated Christmas present. Remember, don't tell her. It's a big surprise. If you live in another city, you can click here to find out when the Rockin' The Stacks Tour will visit your town.

People Are Good

It seems that so much of today's news is negative. Murders. Car accidents. Robberies. Rapes. Political scandals. War. The economy. It's all negative. I often wonder if newspapers and news broadcasts are run by Debbie Downer.

And then just when I think I've lost my faith in humanity, I find a gem of a story that lifts my heart and reminds me that at their very core, people are good.

Jon Yates, the author of the Tribune's What's Your Problem? column usually writes about people getting ripped off and helps to make them whole again. Today, however, he writes of a woman who found a significant amount of cash money just before Christmas and is desperately trying to find the rightful owner. My favorite part of the story below is that at no time did she think about keeping the money for herself, like so many people would have. She's even teaching her children that "finder's keepers" doesn't always apply. That makes my heart skip a beat.

Family Seeks Owners of Missing Money
Jon Yates, What's Your Problem?, Chicago Tribune, Jan. 6, 2011

It would have been easy for Shannon Dowdle to have taken the cash-stuffed envelope and run.

After all, no one had seen her scoop it off the Skokie sidewalk, and there was no way of tracking the wad of money.

But it was just four days before Christmas, and Dowdle is no Mr. Potter.

The Glenview mother thumbed through the more than $1,000 and knew she had to find the rightful owner.

"I didn't count it until I got into the car and I was like, 'Oh gosh,'" Dowdle said. "All these thoughts went through my mind. I was just sick to my stomach."

Given the date (Dec. 21) and where she found the money (outside the Shops at Orchard Place) Dowdle was convinced someone intended to use the cash to purchase Christmas gifts.

"I thought somebody would really be missing it," she said.

Determined to figure out who dropped it, Dowdle took the envelope into three nearby stores: an Ulta cosmetics store, Best Buy and Pier 1 Imports. No one had reported the money missing.

So Dowdle waited. After almost an hour, when it became apparent that whoever lost the money was not coming back, Dowdle left her name and phone number at each store.

On Dec. 23 her husband, Rick Dowdle, went back to the Ulta store and asked if anyone had inquired about the envelope. The store manager said yes, an elderly couple came in earlier that day and asked if anyone had found an envelope filled with cash.

The manager, apparently unaware of earlier events, told the couple no.

The manager asked the elderly couple for their names and address, but they refused to give them, the manager told Dowdle.

"The manager said the couple was pretty upset," Rick Dowdle said. "She said (they) thought someone had found it and kept it."

Since then, the Dowdles and their six children have made it a family project to find the rightful owners.

They contacted e Skokie police and were told no one had reported the money missing, they said. They called security at the shopping center, but there were no reports filed there either.

They posted information about the money on craigslist, but no one responded.

Because the envelope had a bank insignia on it, the family contacted the bank. The bank sent an e-mail to branch managers in the area, but none has reported any knowledge of who the elderly couple might be.

"On Christmas Eve, we had quite a discussion about what to do with the money," Rick Dowdle said.

In the end, the family decided that if it couldn't find the owners, it would donate the money to charity. The Dowdles said their kids were adamant about finding the true owners.

"None of them said, 'Let's go spend it,'" Shannon Dowdle said. "They felt so bad about it. They baby-sit and they know how important it is, the money you make."

Last week, the family e-mailed What's Your Problem? hoping publicity would help track down the elderly couple.

Initially, the Dowdles did not want their name in the paper.

"This isn't about us," Rick Dowdle said.

But when the Problem Solver said he does not publish stories with anonymous sources, the family relented.

Keeping the money was never a consideration, they said.

"It makes you think, what would I want somebody else to do for me?" Shannon Dowdle said.

She realizes the family might never find the true owners.

"It's like a needle in a haystack, I'm telling you," she said. "Hopefully, it will have a happy ending."

If the money is yours, or you know who lost it, contact the Problem Solver via e-mail at yourproblem@tribune.com, or call the Tribune's city desk at 312-222-3650.

The Problem Solver knows the exact amount that was lost, the denominations of the bills and the name of the bank that was on the envelope, so please do not respond unless the money is truly yours.

Will & Kate Wanna Live Like Me!

So I hear that Prince William and his fiance Kate Middleton want to live like "normal" people and have decided to forgo the traditional royal staff. For comparisons sake, Prince Charles has a staff of 150 personal servants. Honestly, how does he manage with such a small staff? Oh, sorry, I digress.

I think it's terrific that Will and Kate want to be like me. How about we trade places? They can live like me and I'll try to live the life they lead.

Certainly, life can't get much more normal than mine...

• I make my own bed.
• I do my own laundry.
• I scrub toilets, scoop cat litter, wash windows, vacuum, dust, mop the floor, and do dishes.
• I run a successful business.
• I sit on two boards and spend a good amount of time volunteering.
• I clip coupons, do my own grocery shopping, and my own cooking.
• I live on a (tight) budget and space out bills during the month so I always have plenty of money.
• I use Freecycle where one person's trash really is another's treasure.
• I take care of my mom and used to help take care of Nana.
• I shop the clearance rack and almost never wear designer or pay full price for clothes (or much else).
• I drive an 11 year old car (well, okay, it's practically new, but still) and before that, I drove a 15 year old car.
• I shovel my own snow, mow my own lawn, and plant my vegetable garden to live healthier and keep my grocery bills down. I also personally weed said garden.
• When I go to a concert or sporting event, I rarely have "great" seats and certainly never a reserved box just for me (although, I'm open to it).
• Paparazzi never follow me around and I don't have a stylist to make sure I am never a fashion "don't" (and if you could have seen me the last 2 weeks, trust me you'd say I needed a stylist).
• I fly like cattle on mass market airlines, always in the economy class and I take public transportation.
• If I ever get married, I will have a very simple ceremony and honeymoon. Me, my fiance, and a minister or justice of the peace on a beach is my style.
• I even write my own blog, write my own Tweets, and communicate personally with my friends on Facebook.

The only thing I have staff for (and it's not even regular staff) is to wake me up in the morning when I've had an especially long night or cannot miss something super early in the morning. But most days, I have to set my own alarm clock.

Will & Kate just let me know when you'd like to change lives. I'm happy to loan out mine for awhile. Otherwise, please stop pretending that you live like normal people.

I'm not complaining. I love my life. Most days. Just like most people, I think. I just think it's funny that two people who obviously know nothing about how most of the world lives (and I realize that I live far better than most of the world) think they are "normal" by forgoing an army of personal servants to do everything from change the roll of toilet paper to fly their personal plane.

All of this said, I'd venture to guess that when Will and Kate takeover my life, they'll be pleased with the assortment of china and silver I have. I seem to inherited an unreal amount of china sets and silver services. Where they all came from, I have no idea. But they'd only have to eat on the same dishes and use the same flatware once every couple of weeks.

My Favorite Christmas Gifts From Nana

As I work to clean out her house and must decide what goes where and to whom and what is garbage, I obviously can't help but think about the life Nana lived. And especially today, on Christmas Eve, I can't help but think about all the wonderful gifts, both tangible and intangible, she gave me over the years.

When I was a kid, Nana made many of my clothes and they were appropriately 1970s stylish (and now you know why there aren't too many pics of me from the 1970s on LMS). Each year, however, I'd receive a very special dress for Christmas that she and my mom would have made together. That was no small feat, considering we lived in Chicago and Nana lived in Florida. The dresses were exquisitely sewn and always fit me to a T. My favorite a red velvet knee length dress with a white lace bib. I can still remember wearing it and feeling like the prettiest girl in the world (with a horrible Dorothy Hamill haircut).

A number of years later, either while I was in college or shortly after I graduated and was living in Washington DC, we were celebrating Christmas in Batesville, MS with all the extended family. All of Nana's sisters were there and all of their kids, grandkids, and maybe even a great-grandkid. There must have been 50 or more of us. Anyway, we were sitting around the tree on Christmas morning and everyone was opening their gifts. Nana handed Mom, Dave, and me each an envelope and when we opened it, we discovered that she had given each of us our own cemetery plot in Batesville, Mississippi! On top of that, she had also purchased one for my dad. Even though my parents had been divorced for 10 years or so, clearly indicating they didn't want to be together during this lifetime, she seemed to believe they wanted to spend eternity lying next to each other. I love her optimism. Unfortunately, none of us wants to be buried in Batesville (I plan to be cremated and have my ashes turned into diamonds and distributed to my loved ones. Yes, you're on the list. You're welcome.)

My favorite gift, however, arrived in 2002. Nana had just gone blind and was fighting to prove that although she couldn't see, she remained just as independent and capable as she'd ever been. Needless to say, she fought hard. 85 years of taking care of everyone wasn't going to end just because she couldn't see.

Just before church on Christmas Eve, Nana came down stairs holding 3 check boxes and asked me to wrap them. This had always been our routine and this year was no different. She would hand me gifts, tell me for whom each gift was meant, and I would wrap them without ever peeking. Frankly, the boxes felt empty, but I dared not say a word. I carefully wrapped and tagged the boxes and gave them back to her in the order she gave them to me.

The next morning, after gifts had been opened, Nana, pulled out the three boxes and beaming with pride, correctly passed them out. Mom, Dave, and I each opened our boxes and burst out laughing. You could see the look of distress as the pride rushed from her face. What could possibly be so gut-wrenching funny about money, I'm sure she wondered.

Having worked in a bank for 40 years, Nana could write a check blind and she had. The only problem was that rather than writing us checks that we could cash, she wrote out the checks on deposit slips. Had we overlaid the deposit slip onto the check and held it up to the light, all of the information would have proven to have been placed correctly on the check, but the "checks" were, of course, uncashable in that form.

As soon as we explained what she'd done and how much we appreciated her gesture, she joined in on the laugh. I think I still have my 2002 Christmas "check" somewhere. In fact, it was the last gift she gave me completely on her own without my mom's assistance.

Christmas Tag

I was tagged in a fun Christmas blog post by my college friend, Sonya, over at Under the Desert Sky. If you don't read her fabulous blog you should. I haven't led you astray before, so you can trust that I won't now.

I honestly haven't been feeling all that Christmasy, so hopefully, this will put me back in the mood. I was in the Christmas spirit, but it left on Sunday.

1. When do you usually know it's the holidays?
I can't believe I'm going to plug this, but I know it's the holidays when I see Santa in his sleigh at the end of the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade. I actually sit in front of the tv in my pj's watching the parade, just like I did when I was a kid, eagerly anticipating the arrival of Santa. It's the only thing Macy's does, in my opinion, that's worth anything. Of course, as an adult, who usually hosts Thanksgiving dinner, I'm also usually cooking while I watch.

2. What do you want for Christmas this year?
Hmmmm...this is tough. I got myself the last 3 seasons of The West Wing on Thanksgiving, while I was cooking and watching the above-mentioned parade because I was able to purchase all three for less than what one season normally sells for. Thanks Amazon! Beyond that, there's really nothing I need and I never feel comfortable saying I just want something to someone, unless I'm jokingly saying I want a $3million bra (surprisingly, I didn't get that...hint...hint...hint). A few years ago, I wrote Santa a letter. It's on Little Merry Sunshine and you can search for it. Needless to say, Santa still hasn't delivered.

3. Do you go all out with decorations?
Yes. Outside lights. A tree with a unique theme each year. Decorations in almost every room, including the bathrooms. I'm all about the Christmas decorations. That said, this year, I held back because there's just too much going on personally to tackle that as well.

4. What are you doing Christmas Eve?
Going to the grocery store, Enterprise Rent-a-car, Home Depot and then either cleaning the garage or painting the eves. Really.

I also made early dinner reservations at The Olde Schoolhouse, which was formerly the one-room school house my grandfather, Jesse, attended. Don't tell my mom about that though. It's a surprise. And then we'll go to church where we'll sit in Nana's pew. After church, we'll probably drive around Palm Harbor looking at all the Christmas lights. There are a few neighborhoods that go all out. Everyone in the neighborhood decorates their house in a completely over-the-top manner. I'll take pictures.

5. What are you doing Christmas Day?
Packing my mom to move back to Chicago and continuing to clean out Nana's house. There's a chance we may drive over to Lakeland to see my mom's alma mater, Florida Southern College, although I doubt it.

Earlier in the year, I declared that we would not be exchanging Christmas gifts this year because of this trip. Evidently, some people (aka Dave) didn't follow those instructions. Unfortunately, the company he ordered my gift from printed what it was all over the outside of the box, so I know what it is. Fortunately, I'm truly excited to have a composter. Yes, really. I've wanted one for a long time. It's a gift only my brother could give me. It's okay that he broke disobeyed my edict. I got Dave and Mom a few gifts as well.

6. It's Christmas time. What are you reading?
Little Women by Louisa May Alcott. It's on my top 10 list of all-time favorite books, but I hadn't read it in years. I picked it up a couple of weeks ago and keep wishing I had more time to read it. The book starts on Christmas Eve, so it's sort of a Christmas book.

7. Favorite movie to watch during the holidays?
That's easy. It's A Wonderful Life. I watch it every year and cry at exactly the same spots.


8. Favorite Christmas song?
O Holy Night sung by Celine Dion. Wow. It takes my breath away each time. O Come All Ye Faithful is a close second, with the Hallelujah Chorus from Handel's Messiah right on its tails. I also love Same Old Lang Syne by Dan Fogelberg. I just read the story behind the song and now I know why I love it so much. Anyone who's ever been in love has had this experience, whether it happened at Christmas or not.






9. Favorite holiday drink?
At my annual Marshall Field's Memorial Dinner & Christmas Party, I always serve a drink I had in The Walnut Room the last year it was Marshall Field's: a Fieldtini. It's green. Go figure. It's completely over-the-top, but wonderful.

10. How is your Christmas shopping going?
It's been done for ages because I hardly did any. I made 35 of Nana's fruitcakes, which have all been distributed and loved by each recipient. Well, except one, but that's okay.

11. If you could spend Christmas Day anywhere else, where would you spend it?
I have these wonderful memories of Christmas at the Northbrook home of my Gardner grandparents when I was little. All the cousins, aunts, uncles and extended family was there every year. It was so much fun getting us all around Grandma's dining room table (there was never a kid's table). I miss those big family Christmas's.

For many of the last 30 years, except for the Christmas' we spent in Batesville, Mississippi, Christmas has been Dave, my mom, and me, but for many of the last 10 years, it's been mostly just Dave and me or just me. They've been okay, but to me, the holidays are about family and it's tough being separated from them. I'm thrilled that Dave, mom and I are together this year and we sort of have Nana with us, even if it won't be a traditional Christmas.

12. Any holiday traditions?
Church on Christmas Eve. Nana's fruitcake. I always work really hard to make Christmas special for the people I love, whether it's a gift that has special meaning, making their favorite food, or spending extra time with them. Reading the Luke 2:1-20 version of the Christmas Story. It always chokes me up. On Christmas morning, we always open stockings first. I have it on good authority that Santa is leaving stockings at my house this year, but I probably shouldn't talk about it.

13. Favorite thing about the holidays?
My favorite part of the holidays is the religious services. I know that sounds odd since I don't go to church very often and I'm not deeply religious, but I just love all of the Advent and Christmas services.

That's it. Hopefully, next year, I'll feel more Christmasy.

Who to tag...
Dr. Monkey von Monkerstein from Monkey Muck
Barrie Spang from Barrie Briggs Spang
Susan at Yeah, And Another Thing

Letters to Nana

Today as I was working on cleaning out Nana's house (it seems like a never-ending process), I found two letters, one each from Dave and me, she'd saved for almost 30 years.

First mine. To set it up, I typed it in 1985, when I was a high shool freshman. I took typing as an elective my first semester and it looks like I typed it at school.

November 3, 1985

Dear Nana,

How are you? I'm fine. School is a lot of fun! I really like it. My classes are pretty interesting and my teachers aren't bad either. My favorite classes are French 1 and Geometry Fast. I'm getting an A in French and a B in Geometry, but it's 2% points from an A. I was pretty happy about the rest of my grades too. They got me on the
honor roll.

David's were just as good as mine, if not better. He made the honor roll too. He got straight B's, which is about what I got my first nine weeks in junior high. He was pretty proud. Soccer is over for the fall season. Now he's playing basketball. He's pretty good at it too. Winter soccer starts sometime next month. He's looking forward to it.

Mom starts work tomorrow, and is looking forward to it, I think. I know she is nervous, but she will do fine. I know I'm looking forward to it. Sometimes we get on each others nerves. I know she is going to do a great job in commercial real estate. I'm really proud of my mom, she always does a great job in whatever she tries to do. It isn't whether or not people like what she does, it's whether or not she keeps trying until someone realizes that she has good ideas. My mom is not a quitter. She keeps working hard for what she believes in. I'm very proud of her!

Marching band is now over for the fall season. It's very cold and no one likes marching in the cold. At our last competition, we received 4th place for marching and music out of 11 bands that were there. We got 1st place out of 180 marching units for festival spirit, which we didn't even work on. It was a fall festival for the town of Sycamore, IL. We won because of our wonderful use of colors. Our school colors are brown and orange, so we all had on brown and orange and had lots of festival spirit!

Love,

Jessica

Obviously, then, like now, I wasn't afraid to say exactly what I was thinking.

David's letter was written 11 years later and was a postcard from Hawaii. If I remember correctly, this was when he was living in San Francisco and he and his roommates flew to Hawaii for a last-minute getaway. My favorite part is that rather than addressing it "Mrs. Frances Paulk" at her post office box, he simply addressed it "Nana" at her PO box.

Nana,

I knew I got a postcard for you. I cleaned my room today and found it. I'm sorry I didn't send it from Hawaii. I went to this spot. The picture doesn't do it justice. And it's too bad you can't see the trail that takes you out to this point. That was just as amazing as the point. It was very narrow and surrounded by a thick rainforest.

I love you Nana.

David

She didn't save all the letters we sent, so I guess these especially touched
her. I know they touched me reading them today.

Hallelujah Chorus Flash Mob

Almost nothing puts me in the Christmas Spirit like Handel's Messiah and especially the Hallelujah Chorus. I've been privileged to hear Messiah at the Washington National Cathedral twice while I lived there and can honestly tell you that no other performance compares.

Until now.

Today I heard about the Hallelujah Chorus performed by a flash mob at the Welland Seaway Mall food court.

You simply must watch the video below to the end. If it doesn't put you in the Christmas Spirit, then I don't know what will. As always, if you read Little Merry Sunshine via email, make sure you visit the blog to watch the video.

Hey! The Elgin-O'Hare Doesn't Go to Either Place!

If you drive in the Chicago Area, you know that once in awhile traffic can be a little frustrating. Reporters talk about things like the Hillside Strangler, the Merge, the Spaghetti Bowl, Hubbard's Cave, and other places you'll never find on a map. To make life more difficult, they give you times between all of these mystery locations. It's all fine and good to know that it'll take you 90 minutes to get between the Circle and Hubbard's Cave, but if you don't know what or where those are, you may as well have just been told how long it takes to fly to the moon.

In her new report, Decoding Chicago Traffic Reports, Sarah Jindra of WBEZ, Chicago's public radio station, has come to your rescue and unraveled the mystery that is Chicago's roads for us. She explains what and where each road is located, what the base times are, and answers all of our traffic questions. Note to WBEZ: Give Sarah a huge raise for this gift to Chicagoans.

Print it out and memorize it. You'll be glad you did.