But I know that many of you do not have the vast staff I have and have not even started your holiday shopping, even though you've only got 2 days left until Christmas. As my gift to you, I have compiled a list of my Favorite Things a la Oprah's Favorite Things perfect for all your gift giving needs (unless you're shopping for me, in which case you should refer to this list).
Without further ado, Little Merry Sunshine's Holiday Gift Guide . . .
Do you know women or men insecure about the hair down there? Do you get sick and tired with your hook-ups commenting "Huh, I thought you were a natural blonde?" With Betty Beauty, you will be the only one to know you're not truly a natural blonde! Or you can surprise your one-night stand with one of the many on-trend colors including hot pink and blue! And what says you're feeling holiday festive more than a red and green Betty? Over 150,000 satisfied clients!
Is your Dad a golf fanatic? Do you find yourself a golf widow wishing her man or woman was at home rather than pissing away another Saturday on the course? Have you found that with the recession, the golfer you love can no longer afford to play golf every weekend? Give the golfer in your life the Potty Putter for hours of fun!
This year, like no other before it, eco-friendly gifts are all the rage. No one wants to increase their carbon footprint, yet we all want to give personalized, one-of-a-kind gifts. Luckily, the Miller Park Zoo in Bloomington, Illinois has come to our rescue with their Reindeer Dung Christmas Ornaments!
Are you tired of your bananas getting crushed in your briefcase? With the Banana Bunker that problem is solved forever!
For the multitasking guy in your life, you'll want to give him the Weener Kleener! One size fits most.
If you're the kind of person who likes their gifts to live into eternity, I'd recommend naming a newly discovered bat species after your loved one. Nothing quite says "I love you" like naming a flying rodent after someone.
Help build your partner's ego with the new Condometric - The Measuring Tape Condom!
Finally, no list of favorite gifts would be complete without a gift from the Queen of Favorite Things herself - Oprah Winfrey. Therefore, Little Merry Sunshine is pleased to suggest the Oprah Snow Globe.
I'm certain that any of these gifts would be greatly appreciated (but not by me). Merry Christmas & Happy Shopping!