100 New Experiences in 12 Months

Over the past few months, I've come to realize that I've stopped being as adventurous as I used to be. Once upon a time, I picked up and moved to Washington DC where I knew no one. That was just a few weeks after I flew out and spent a week pounding the pavement and knocking on doors until someone interviewed me and then gave me a summer internship working for someone else.

Almost three years ago, I created my Bucket List. I've made some progress on it and I'm proud of that progress. The items on my Bucket List still excite me. But my Bucket List lacks one thing: urgency.

Do you know the difference between a dream and a goal? Dates. Goals have dates attached to them. Dreams are "some day" things. Goals have a begin and end date. 

Because I need to find my adventurous side again and I want to live more fully than I have been in the past year, I'm taking some inspiration from Amy Guth, Social Media Manager at the Chicago Tribune. If you don't follow Amy on Twitter, you're missing out. Trust me. She's tough, smart, witty, and one of the coolest women on the interwebs. Amy has decided to spice up her life by doing 1,000 new things in one year. How cool is that?

1,000 new experiences feels completely overwhelming to me, but 100 feels daunting and exciting at the same time. In fact, since I had this idea early last week, I've flown out of bed each morning with new ideas. Some of the ideas listed below are from my Bucket List and some are new. 

Here are my ground rules: "New" is defined as something I've never done or have not done in more than 10 years. My list is ever growing. I will share stories and pictures of each experience. The year kicked off on April 11, 2013 and will conclude on April 10, 2014.

1. Attend a taping of Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me
2. Vacation by myself and take care of only me. - DONE 4/11 - 4/15/2013
3. Vacation in Nashville - DONE 4/11 - 4/15/2013
4. Go on vacation and leave work 100% behind (i.e., don't check email or voice mail) - DONE 4/15/2013
5. Stand in the center of both the Grand Ole Opry and Ryman Auditorium stages - DONE 4/12/2013 and 4/14/2013
6. Play Elvis's piano at the RCA Studio B - DONE 4/12/2013
7. Sit on the stage at the Civic Opera House during a performance - Will be done 6/16/2013
8. Play with the beluga whales at the Shedd Acquarium - Will be done by June 30th
9. Take a cooking class - Scheduled for May 21st at David's Bistro in Antioch
10. Swim 1 mile without stopping
11. Climb the main dune at Sleeping Bear Dunes - Will be done in August
12. Learn a new skill - DONE 4/24/2013 Learned how to make a floral centerpiece
13. Increase by savings account by 2 months worth of expenses
14. Max out my employer match for my 403(b) in 2013 - DONE Increased my contribution to max out the match 5/2/2013
15. Try 20 new foods
16. Lose 50 pounds
17. Attend a concert in Millenium Park
18. Ride a mechanical bull
19. Sing karaoke
20. Attend a baseball game at Milwaukee's Miller Park - Will be done August 15th
21. Take the ferry to Muskegon or Ludington - Will be done in August
22. Run a 5K
23. Take a golf lesson
24. Have a full spa day - massage, mani/pedi, facial, and anything other fancy spa treatment I can find
25. Take an Ivy League Class
26. Stand on the sky deck ledge in the Sears Tower (don't tell me it's called Willis Tower now, I don't care)
27. Visit Mt. Rushmore
28. Do a polar plunge
29. Reupholster my dining room chairs
30. Visit the Museum of Science & Industry
31. Visit the Museum of Contemporary Art
32. Visit the National Museum of Mexican Art
33. Visit the Adler Planetarium
34. Visit the DuSable Museum of African American Art
35. Visit the Field Museum of Natural History
36. Visit the Notebaert Nature Museum
37. Give up Diet Coke (and all soda)
38. Drink a minimum of 64 oz of water each day
39. Have High Tea at The Drake
40. Serve meals in a soup kitchen
41. Tour the Chicago Tribune
42. Attend the Blue Man Group
43. Attend the Book of Mormon
44. Visit Chicago's Chinatown
45. Visit the Illinois Holocaust Museum
46. Reread my favorite books from childhood: the Little House on the Prairie series, Little Women, the Anne of Green Gables series
47. See Oklahoma at the Civic Opera House - Will be done 5/3/2013
48. Visit Galena, Illinois
49. 
    

Putting these ideas down on "paper" was the easy part. Now, I need to get to living life as fully as possible.

Do any of my ideas inspire you? Want to join me on my journey? Let me know and let's team up. Life's more fun when it's experienced with friends.

LMS Bucket List #10: Create a Scholarship at my Alma Mater

After years in the planning, yesterday I was finally able make a long time goal and Bucket List Item #10 a reality.

I created the Gardner Legacy Scholarship at my alma mater, Lake Forest College.

The Gardner Legacy Scholarship will be awarded in the 2013-14 academic year to a deserving first year student with demonstrated financial need. Priority shall be given to family members of Lake Forest alumni and students who achieved a 3.5 high school GPA on a 4-point scale.

I created this scholarship in honor of my cousin, Alan Gardner '90, who was instrumental in my decision to attend LFC. But for our overlapping year at LFC, I don't think we'd still be as close as we are 26 years after we first met in 1986. It was during that year that we truly went from being family to being friends.

Aside from this incredibly important family relationship, it was important to me to help a student get through college because LFC made it financially possible for me to attend, when I didn't have the money and the opportunities I've had as a result of my outstanding college education and the network I built during those four years is priceless.

Almost on a daily basis, I find something in my life that wouldn't have happened or wouldn't be possible without all that I learned at LFC. I can't tell you that what I learned in Multivariable Calculus is something I use daily (or at all), but I do use the analytical and reasoning skills I learned in it at least once a day. Being a psychology major constantly helps me better understand people and their motivations. Participating in the Urban Studies Program taught me how to navigate Chicago, which enabled me to strike out on my own in Washington DC and know I'd be okay.

Knowing that I'm helping a student have experiences that will shape them and their dreams is one of the most fulfilling things I've ever done.

Bucket List Item #36: Donate Blood Again

With a little lot of help from a special friend, I overcame my fear of needles tonight and donated blood. Actually, we did it together.

I've been afraid of needles for as long as I can remember. I hate getting shots (although I did get a tetanus shot this week too, but that's another story), still get queasy giving Ross his insulin twice a day, and the thought of acupuncture is enough to send me over the edge. Blood tests are often more than I can handle because it's difficult to hit a vein, so I end up with bruises all over both arms and I bleed slowly.

Giving blood has been out of the question for two decades. I last gave blood on April 8, 1992 in college and I was terrified. (No, I didn't know the exact date, LifeSource did today). The phlebotomist couldn't find the vein and when she finally hit it, I bled at a pace slower than molasses. I started hyperventilating and a friend arrived just in time to distract me and keep me company while the vampire phlebotomist sucked a pint of blood out of me. Since then, I've come close to giving blood a few times, but always chickened out.

Until tonight.

Last week this friend of mine suggested an evening out donating blood followed by dinner. His rationale? He knew giving blood was on my Bucket List, he wanted to help me get over my fear of needles, and he thought we'd have fun doing something to make the world better. Plus, he was going to buy dinner. How could I say no with that kind of logic?

So I pre-gamed all day by eating well (breakfast, small snack, lunch, small snack) and drinking lots of water and arrived at LifeSource in Lake Bluff at the appointed hour without fainting. To say I was nervous was an understatement. I left home this morning without my iPod or a book for distraction, and decided that at 40, I was too old to clutch my trusty teddy bear, so I left it at home too. Yes, I was going to be brave.

Brave quickly turned into a pool of raw nerves and difficulty breathing. After checking my vital signs and answering a series of health questions, I was told I qualified to give blood and to have a seat in the reclining chair. About 10 minutes later, the nice nurse found my vein and I swear put the needle through my entire arm. She kept telling me to breath because I guess I wasn't. I kept squeezing the ball because I don't particularly like to share and so my blood wasn't flowing.

Maybe fifteen minutes later, I had given away all the blood in my body, the needle was removed, I was left with a bruise that looks something like the State of Florida on my arm, and the phlebotomist was asking if she could schedule my next appointment in 8 weeks.

I survived and even have a cool shark bandaid on my arm covering the nasty bruise. Did it hurt? Yes, but not as badly as I thought it would. I think it was more the idea of the needle that hurt more than the actual needle. Am I glad I did it? I am. The blood I donated tonight could help to save up to three lives. That's awesome. Am I over my fear of needles? No. In fact, not even close. Will I do it again any time soon? I'm honestly not sure. Maybe. It will depend if my friend will take me with him again.

Bucket List # 67: Buy a House

The ring of keys to my first home.

It is truly the worst kept secret, but as of late this afternoon, I'm officially a homeowner and checked Bucket List Item #67 off my list. I bought a condo in Lake Bluff.

In so many ways buying this condo is the fulfillment of a very long-held dream.

When I lived in DC in my 20s (yes, that would be the 1990s), friends of mine were buying places, but it took about 5 years of renting before I finally felt "old enough" and started thinking of buying the condo I was living in in 1999. When I rented it, the owner told me he would give me right of first refusal, but then went back on that in early 2000 and sold it without even telling me it was on the market until I received notice I had 60 days to leave because it had been sold. I moved to Chicago shortly after that and for a variety of reasons, couldn't entertain the thought of purchasing my own home.

Fast forward 11 years.

It was only 2 1/2 months ago that I actually started to seriously imagine owning a home.

I was looking at rental units online and found one in my LFC girlfriend Wini's building. Chatting with my LFC friend Derek about it, he suggested I look at buying because of how low housing prices and interest rates were. I hadn't even thought about buying because it didn't occur to me that I could. Suddenly, my heart was atwitter with the idea of owning my own home. I got pre-approved with ease and Derek referred me to the most incredible real estate agent ever.

Shelley Goddard of Coldwell Banker in Lake Forest made the entire first-time buying experience fun, easy-to-understand, and pretty painless. She was a tough negotiator who enabled me to purchase my new home for 75% of the current asking price (70% of the original asking price that had only just been reduced when I stumbled upon the condo) by backing up our offers with thorough research and comps. Once we had a contract, Shelley's advocacy work on my behalf continued as she helped navigate the difficult waters of securing the condo documents with a non-responsive seller's agent and attorney. Even sitting at the closing today, Shelley was advocating on my behalf when the seller failed to fix all of the items in the inspection report because he "didn't know they were there" (even though his attorney agreed to fix them in writing). When I got cold feet, she talked me through, it to make sure I was making the decision that was best for me. All along the way, Shelley had my best interest as her primary focus and motivation. Part of what makes Shelley great is that she only works by referral, will never represent both the buyer and the seller in the same transaction (which is legal in Illinois, but really only in the agent's best interest), and only works with a small number of clients at a time. Shelley's 32 year history of living and working in Lake Forest and Lake Bluff also gave me an advantage. I honestly can't imagine buying or selling a home with anyone else.

Shelley then referred me to mortgage broker Bob Degen of Fifth Third Bank in Lake Forest who also worked tirelessly to get me an unbelievable mortgage rate and make the mortgage process as simple as it could be, even with a few snafus due to a change in my down payment funding less than 24 hours before closing. True to his word, Bob enabled my deal to close in 30 days, which is unheard of. He even came to the closing today. Rates have dropped again and if you are thinking about buying a home or want to refinance your current home, call Bob and tell him I referred you. He's the only mortgage broker I will ever deal with.

My attorney, Kathleen Rodriguez, a girlfriend of mine in Arlington Heights, got me through a very difficult attorney review and inspection period, which honestly didn't end until we were sitting at the closing table. She talked me off the ledge more than once and held my hand through the closing process as I developed carpel tunnel syndrome from signing my name 792 times. I had been very confused about how all the credits worked and even through this morning, I was very nervous, but Kathleen explained it all so I could understand it easily. And she fought a good fight with the seller's attorney today when it turned out they didn't fix a safety issue in the inspection. Kathleen was worth her fees many times over. She doesn't have a website, but if you need a real estate attorney, let me know and I'll give you her information.

Another Forester girlfriend, Kara, couldn't stop raving about the movers she hired for her recent move and referred me to LFC alum Derrick Spencer of Aaron Brothers Moving. Derrick and his company are officially moving me next week.

Finally, after the closing today, I met my original Forester Friend Tim State, his boyfriend Michael Norpell, and Wini at the condo to help pick out the color Michael is going to paint my bedroom. Michael is an interior designer, so he really knows his stuff and is going to help me make my condo elegant and classy. Even though I had fallen in love with Silver Peony about 18 months ago on Forester girlfriend and interior designer, Barrie Spang's blog, The Designing Life (scroll all the way down on the home page and see the picture called "Master Bedroom"), we ended up choosing Lavender Ice, a color Tim and Michael have in their home.

This is what I'll see when I look out my bedroom window each morning.

Lest you have any doubt, buying, moving into and decorating my first home would not be possible without my Forester Family and their connections.

I can't wait to get moved in and settled. And more than that, I can't wait to host my first dinner party. Then it will truly feel like home.

My Credit Card Number Was Stolen...Again

Yesterday morning I received a voice mail message from my credit card company regarding some possible fraud on my account. You might think this would freak me out, but I've been down this road before with the same credit card company and the same credit card, so I simply couldn't get terribly excited about this. Plus, until the last few months, I've carried a balance on this card for the last couple of years (making on-time payments each month), but as of Thursday the card will be 100% paid off. So to be honest, when I heard there may be fraud on the account I thought they were worried the fraud might be having no balance and how that meant they would no longer collect interest from me.

Unfortunately, it turned out that there was actual fraud on my account. Some enterprising whippersnapper was attempting to travel around Europe on my dime. Well, on my credit card company's dime. And fortunately, the company caught it within 12 hours and called me immediately. Using my credit card number (but not the card which was safely in my possession), a Eurail pass had been purchased in Belgium, along with travel club membership, some fun stuff in Paris, and some movies from Netflix.

Was I currently in Europe? the nice woman from customer service wanted to know. I was sitting in the parking lot of a shoe store in Rolling Meadows, most definitely not Paris. Moments later, the charges were reversed, my account closed, and a new card was on its way to me.

As I mentioned, this is actually the second time this has happened. In November 2008, someone got a hold of my card number and joined a bunch of porn websites. In that situation, my credit card company was also on top of things and handled the matter quickly.

Two years ago, I believed there was a breach with the card company and today, I'm more convinced than ever. Why? Because I don't carry my credit card with me (I keep it in a safe place), I'm obsessive about shredding, I don't receive paper statements, I pay bills online directly with the card company, have all kinds of security on my computer, and rarely use the card (in the last 2 months I've used it twice for a total of less than $100 in purchases). Plus, in today's Tribune, I read an article about $3500 being stolen from ATMs of the same bank my credit card is through using credit/debit cards that the four victims said were still in their possession. Clearly, it's not me; it's the bank.

All of this talk yesterday about traveling through Europe got me to thinking: Even if I wanted to hop on a plane tomorrow and spend a few days wandering the streets of Paris, I couldn't do it. I don't have a passport.

I'm 38 days away from turning 40 and I've never left the country and couldn't if I wanted to.

So tonight I completed a passport application. And I'll formally apply at the post office during my lunch hour on Thursday.

Check another item off my Bucket List.

Moments

I've been thinking about life's moments lately. I'm not really sure why I've been focused on individual moments rather than entire events. Maybe it's because I've been working on checking off items on my Bucket List. Maybe it's because of a song I can't get out of my head by George Strait called The Breath You Take. Whatever the reason, I can't get the words "life is not measured by the number of breaths you take, but by the moments that take your breath away."

Every time I hear this song, my eyes well up. Trust me, yours will too.



The Breath You Take by George Strait
He looks up from second base dad’s up in the stands
He saw the hit, the run, the slide there ain’t no bigger fan
In the parking lot after the game he said
“Dad I thought you had a plane to catch”
He smiled and said “Yeah son I did”

Chours
Life’s not the breaths you take
The breathing in and out
That gets you through the day
Ain’t what it’s all about
Ya just might miss the point
Try’n to win the race
Life’s not the breaths you take
But the moments that take your breath away

Fast forward fifteen years
And a thousand miles away
Boy’s built a life he’s got a wife
And a baby due today
He hears a voice saying “I made it son
He said “I told you dad you didn’t have to come”
He smiles and says ”Yeah I know you did”

Chours

Just like it took my breath when she was born
Just like it took my breath away when dad took his last that morn

Life’s not the breaths you take
The breathing in and out
That gets you through the day
Ain’t what it’s all about
Ya just might miss the point
If ya don’t slow down the pace
Life’s not the breaths you take
But the moments that take your breath away

Then this morning, a friend of mine posted the RadioLab video "Moments" below on Facebook.

Next Year's Watervale Goal: Climb Baldy at Night

The view from the top of Baldy would be 1000 times better than this.

Over the last few years, as I am planning my Watervale trip, I have developed the habit of challenging myself physically. In 2004, I climbed Baldy for the first time in almost 15 years. In 2008, I learned to kayak and kayaked from Lower Herring Lake through the Outlet and over the dam to Lake Michigan and back. This year, I climbed Baldy and swam to BooHoo. Accomplishing each of these goals makes me truly proud and confident in myself.

And now, thanks to my friend Benny Jay*, who I have known for close to 20 years because he and his family have the great sense to vacation at Watervale, I know what I'm going to do next summer . . . I'm going to climb Baldy at night.

Benny Jay's daughters climbed Baldy one night while we were there. (Go read about their adventure here). Now, I will grant you, these amazing women are half my age and they run Baldy everyday, but I can do this too.

I've always wanted to climb Baldy at night, but never really let myself entertain the thought for more than a few fleeting moments because I didn't think I could. But that's the benefit of making the decision to do it now: I've got 11 months to get into shape for it and all the exercise will help me in my plan to lose weight before I turn 40 (see Bucket List Item #22).

I can only imagine the sight of a sky with a full 360 degree view of stars without the glare of lights or trees blocking the way. Maybe I'll see some shooting stars or even the Northern Lights.

Plus, I think that climbing Baldy at night may be a terrific way to celebrate my 40th birthday.

*Benny Jay is the best writer in Chicago. Seriously. He keeps all the politicians on their toes with his work for The Reader and his exposure of Mayor Daley's favorite slush fund: TIFs. In his spare time writes for the second best blog in the city, The Third City. If you're not already doing so, you should read Benny Jay's work every day.

My Bucket List

Do you have a Bucket List? You know, a list of things you want to do before you die? I've always sort of had one, but never written mine down. But then I got to thinking that if I didn't have it written down anywhere, I might not actually ever do the things I dream of doing.

Without further ado and in no particular order, here's my Bucket List.

1. Write a novel and have it published.
2. Travel to 6 of the 7 continents (I have no need to visit Antarctica).
3. Kiss the man I love at the top of the Eiffel Tower (sure, it's cliche, but so what).
4. Marry the man of my dreams (and never get divorced).
5. Be a mom (being a step-mom or adopting kid(s) would be perfect).
6. Visit New York City. (I've actually been there twice for 2 1-day business trips, but I want to really SEE New York City - Ellis Island, Statue of Liberty, Central Park, tour the United Nations, walk across the Brooklyn Bridge, see a Broadway show, etc.)
7. See a baseball game at every major league stadium (I've been to two - Wrigley Field and Oriole Park at Camden Yards, well, three if you count the Old Comiskey Park).
8. Attend the Cubs World Series Championship Victory Parade.
9. Have my gardens featured in a Garden Walk.
10. Create a scholarship at my alma mater.
11. Visit the Great Wall of China, the Egyptian Pyramids, and Stonehenge.
12. Read the Complete Works of William Shakespeare.
13. Tour the Sistine Chapel and attend mass at the Vatican.
14. Take the ferry to Muskegon or Ludington (rather than drive all the way to Watervale).

15. Cook every recipe in Julia Child's Mastering the Art of French Cooking.
16. Attend a Democratic National Committee convention as a delegate.
17. Be an extra in a movie.
18. Run for public office.
19. Drive from Chicago to LA on Route 66.
20. Learn to snow ski.
21. Run and complete a half-marathon.
22. Lose 100 pounds by my 40th birthday. I've got 10 1/2 months.
23. Visit the Grand Canyon and Mt. Rushmore.
24. Sky dive.
25. Learn to scuba dive and dive the Great Barrier Reef.
26. Learn how to shoot a gun.
27. Ride a motorcycle.
28. Have my picture taken with a sitting President.
29. Have front row seats for a U2 concert.
30. Saber a bottle of champagne.

31. Ride a camel.
32. Sing karaoke (I even have a song picked out).
33. Learn to play tennis.
34. Cruise the Greek Islands.

There are quite a few additional To Do's on my Bucket List, but seeing as how Little Merry Sunshine is a family blog (well, at least my family reads it), I must keep those items private. :)

What's on your Bucket List?